Home of Andy and Diane's ramblings

Friday 31st October 2008 - Halloween, a celebration of all things ghoulish & ghostly and traditionally a time for things to go bump in the night... and this year's no exception, with sundry members of the parish bouncing off walls, crashing into lamp-posts and generally looking like a rather bibulous re-enactment of Michael Jackson's "Thriller" as they wend their drunken way homewards from another Clayton-Smith soirée. As per usual, the evening ended with the house looking like it had been raided by a SWAT team, or a rugby tour - or both, at the same time - with food, drink and other forms of beastly oomska strewn hither and yon (and, in particular, with showers of pink boa feathers in every room of the house - thanks for that one, Mr Hammersley). Hopefully, a good time was had by all - certainly the resulting memory loss and hangover would appear to indicate that it was a pretty splendid evening, as does the rather unpleasant behaviour captured for posterity by the trusty ACScam... take a look [here]. Really... will these people ever grow up?

Sunday 6th July 2008 - and, having just completed a five-hour drive through absolute monsoon conditions, la famille Clayton-Smith is back from a splendid few days R&R in (not-always-so) sunny Wales. Once again, it's time to answer the call of the great outdoors and on this occasion the rather lovely Mwnt (pron. 'Moont') in Cardigan Bay is the venue. Ty-Gwynn Farm offers peace, seclusion, breathtaking scenery and total escape from the humdrum. As you can see from the photos [here] the weather was far from perfect and, to be honest, the facilities were a little 'basic' (downright bloody medieval in actual fact) nevertheless, it is a lovely place to get away from it all. Diane took some photos that capture the vibe perfectly - you can see them [here]. Highlights of the trip? Too many to mention really - Red Kites circling the hills and Choughs hurtling noisily around the cliffs? Watching Charlie and Bert risk life, limb and possible arrest for beach invasion - just to get some sea-swimming in? Sitting on the top of Foel y Mwnt on the look-out for dolphins and grey seals? Glorious organic beef from our friends at Cwm-y-Gerwyn, cooked over a camp-stove and washed down with a glass or two of red wine whilst watching the sun setting over the bay? Yep - any one of those'd do it.

Friday 30th May 2008 - and an anonymous well-wisher sends us slightly belated fifteenth wedding anniversary greetings in a very imaginative and unique manner - by burning down Diane's place of work. Well, to be honest, there's no firm proof just yet that this was the reason for this heinous deed but when one ponders the probable cause, how else could it have happened? Whilst la famille CS was enjoying a spot of much-deserved R & R, the headquarters of Melton Borough Council was doing its own little homage to Hollywood, with a fine rendition-in-miniature of 'Towering Inferno' with the vast majority of the building going up in smoke, thereby leaving several hundred hard-working local government employees with a damned good excuse for a long weekend. Typical of Diane's luck that she was already on hols and therefore missed-out on the opportunity to abuse the local tax payer with a bit of impromptu 'crashing-out in the garden with a Pimms on full pay' action that everybody else no doubt got up to. Being ever mindful of the need to maintain a dignified level of decorum and not wanting to appear like some dreadful ghoul, picking over the still-smouldering ashes of this once fine establishment, Diane waited a whole three nano-seconds before snatching up the trusty DCScam, jumping into her car and zooming Melton Mowbray-wards to assess the damage and generally bob about behind the TV reporters, looking nosey. The results of her expedition can be found [here].

Saturday 17th May 2008 - and it's all change once again at Casa Clayton-Smith. After a lot of pondering and weighing-up, it was decided that the DevelopMentor thing just wasn't working out and so it's time for a spot of Proustian activity, with a return journey to the gang at Tudor Rose. Old company but an entirely new role and one that has started pretty well - with a flight to Turin and bed & board in the rather splendid Castello di Pavone. In terms of places to hold a conference, this one has to come fairly high up in the list - a beautifully preserved medieval castle, superb victuals, great rooms with incredible views... all in all, pretty spectacular, as you can see [here]. You'd have thought this would be hard to beat, however, the back-end of the week might just have managed to do so, as the party decamped and headed into town to the Lingotto, which turns out to be the old Fiat factory in the centre of Turin - the one with the race-track on the roof, made famous in The Italian Job. So - what does one do when visiting such an iconic landmark? Get amongst it, obviously and so, after checking-in, it was straight off to reception to request the keys and then up to the roof level for a trot around the track. Unfortunately, there was no Cooper S (like this) to hand and, to add insult to injury, the rather a more eco-friendly vehicle offered in its place turned out to be a Segway Personal Transporter (like this). Luckily though, a level of self-respect was ultimately retained by way of inclement weather. Apparently there was concern about potential high speed blow-outs being caused by excess rainwater and so we were eventually reduced to walking around the track instead. Given it's location (i.e. in Italy) one would have assumed that the owners of the Lingotto test track would be more than familiar with atrocious driving but on this occasion that was apparently not the case. Still, in the final analysis it was probably best to leave it to Michael Caine & Co. Snaps of a rather rainy and grey Turin can be found [here].

Sunday 20th April 2008 - and just back from a few days of battery recharging in the delightful Cwm-y-Gerwyn, Powys. Whilst this was hardly a new adventure it was nevertheless a corking few days - there are a few snaps [here]. This is probably one of those 'nuff said' moments... glorious place, way off the beaten track, quiet, no TV, no radio, no orange glow in the night sky, no planes, no trains, no traffic zooming up and down outside the lounge window... heaven, basically.

Monday 14th April 2008 - the bright lights of Nottingham beckon once again as we head for that well-known den of iniquity Rock City, for an evening of terpsichory and muse with popular Manchester skiffle combo Elbow. What an evening! From the second the first can of Red Stripe went 'phut' this was always going to be a top night - a great view of the stage from the balcony and thankfully not too many jokers bumbling around the place and generally getting in the way (although, special thanks do go out to the two drunken toss-pots who spent the entire evening shouting loudly over the music about their crap mates / crap birds / crap jobs / crap football results / crap lives, etc. Thanks for adding that little special something to proceedings, fellahs). Anyhoo, twerps aside, Elbow were absolutely awesome, start to finish - easily the best fifteen quid's worth of ticket that has been bought for a long time. Amazingly, not only was the main act totally topper but the support was brilliant too! Check out Two Gallants if you get the chance - great guitarist and a very, very loud drummer, who looks rather like Animal from the Muppets. Basically, they make a really interesting sound and are the creators of possibly the largest noise ever to come from just two people on a stage... great stuff. ACScam wasn't in service on this occasion and so the rather shabby ACS and DCSmobile-cams were brought into service - not particularly great quality but hopefully you get the general idea from the snap to the left. Elbow - superb band and a great new album... go and see them now!!

Monday 10th March 2008 - It's globe-trotting time again and on this occasion the venue is the world's biggest hotel, the mind-bogglingly vast Venetian, Las Vegas for MIX08. This was Andy's first visit and it has to be said that whilst it's a breathtaking kind of place, in the final analysis Las Vegas smells and is basically full of pensioners with gambling addictions and/or beered-up rednecks. That said, the Venetian is just hilariously over the top - for example, the sightseer can enjoy a wander over the Rialto Bridge in a fashion that the original architect would surely have approved of... by escalator. Alternatively, one might decide to wander alongside a facsimile Grand Canal or dine 'al-fresco-insido' in a gargantuan hall that houses an entire Venetian piazza, fully equipped with street entertainers, stripy shirted Gondoliers and hoards of sweaty accordionists belting out dodgy operatics. All this under a splendid azure blue trompe-l'oeil ceiling, so large that it really does look like the sky... the weird thing being that outside the sky actually IS that blue and the temperature just as pleasant, which seems to have escaped the people that run the place. Similarly, over at Caesars Palace you can wander the streets of the Forum, shopping away to your heart's content, winding through tiny cobbled Roman lanes under blue skies and sunshine - even at eleven o'clock at night... all very weird and slightly disorientating. It's a funny old place, as you can see from the photos [here]. In conclusion, it's worth reminding you that Americans are lunatics - fact.

Friday 15th February 2008 - suffice it to say that skiing is not a favoured pastime in the Clayton-Smith household - and this should have been borne in mind by a certain portly individual before he hopped onto a button lift and headed off up the bunny slopes of Winter Park. Clearly, the altitude and the thrill of pootling up the mountain on Denver's famous Ski-Train must have gone to Andy's head - a temporary lapse of reason which inevitably led to a series of inelegant stumbles, trips, collisions & extreme wipe-outs that, in turn, served as ample reminder of the fact that fat blokes don't have low centres of gravity... ho hum. Having re-gained a grip on reality the skis & boots were quickly handed-in and a seat was found outside the rather splendid Derailer Bar, where beers were enjoyed & crowds were watched - far more the thing to do. At 4:15pm the train whistle blew, signalling the start of the return-leg and, more importantly, margarita time - woohoo! There are a few snaps of the day [here]. Denver is a top town and well worth a visit if you get chance. A mile up the air gets a little thin so take it easy on the partying front for a day or so, however, once acclimatised there's more than enough to keep one occupied. Top tips from this trip? The Hotel Monaco is well worth a look - a rather funky and pet-friendly place (there's even a Director of Pet Relations, Hercules the Shih Tzu) with restaurant & bar Panzano built-in and all of this just around the corner from the 16th Street Mall. Retail therapy-wise, REI is based in the former Denver Tramway Building - a huge place with loads to buy if you're even vaguely the outward-bound type. Bar-wise, there's the Rock Bottom Brewery on 16th and just across the road from this is Willie Gs, where they do a mean lobster. It's all good!

Sunday 20th January 2008 - Good old Frisby-on-the-Wreake seems a bit grey and dreary at the moment, mainly as somebody's just back from Los Angeles where it was sunny, hot and generally not a bad place to be - despite the Americans. Before that, it was Redmond (which is just north of Seattle) where there was a stack of snow and it all looked very Grizzly Adams... OK, granted, not an entirely dissimilar temperature to home but the mountains and the lakes made a rather better backdrop than the mud and flood that seems to make up life in the East Midlands right now. Oh for the summer time, for long days, evenings sat in the garden enjoying a glass or two of wine and the company of good firends, balmy, halcyon days with NO WELLINGTONS OR WAX JACKETS! Anyhoo, returning to the original point. a pretty good trip with a few laughs along the way - culminating in a few beers at the Hilton LAX with Mickey Dolenz (aka Monkee Boy)… how surreal is that? On the whole then, the role of Microsoft Alliance Manager would seem to be working out fairly well. Next stop – Denver... bring it on!

Tuesday 1st January 2008 - where on earth has the year gone, part two... Bloody hell - it's New Year's Day! As in previous years, New Year's Eve was spent at The Bell, where the assembled mob enjoyed an evening comprising sundry victuals, overt bonhomie and the general rowdiness - activities with which said establishment has become somewhat synonymous. As you can see from the ACScam snaps [here] having chugged down several pints/bottles and laid waste to a small EU mountain of grub, the party rapidly descended into the usual drunken mess that signifies a Frisby-on-the-Wreake social event and, as far as your humble reporter can recall, a good time was had by all – which is probably a good thing as it would appear that we ended up spending a sum not unadjacent to the gross national product of Japan on this particularbash. Ho hum – time to welcome in the new year in traditional fashion i.e. hung-over and penniless…  here’s to 2008!!

Now then - where on earth did I leave my shoes, braces and wallet?

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